Hiding inside Myself (Mask of Rage)

Anguish, Rage, Angst, Anger... those were the feelings that describes me last year if my memory serves me right. Many people have seen me with the aura of a black woman. Full of negative emotions thrown towards every soul I meet along the way. To be honest, I was not aware until I was forced to come out of my comfort zone and burst into a very loud cry. Cry that has been buried for a long time. Now i know, It was not just last year. It was a product of too much suppression. It was a product of unexpressed emotions when i was not confronting every difficult situation, a product of every unfair circumstance life has thrown over me. Now that I am looking at it, I can see the changes i have had. MY shell now is broken, giving me the opportunity to make it, to explore the world and to laugh it in every tear shed for the past that has been rewarding to my personality now.

I was reborn and I must say my struggle with my mask of rage does not end here. It gives me the challenge to finally unveil it and make myself accept every unfair instances i may encounter. To deal with it with a smile on my face. I am trying hard to control my emotions, Now I’ve learned it is okay to express it. Anyway, there is another better way of expressing upset feelings and disappointments. Fixing my every relationships with people: A past lover, a family member, and every people i met and will be meeting along the way. I shall not convince people to see that I am happy. I shall first, convince myself! And foremost, make it happen! Make it reflect in my smile, in my aura. I have fallen apart but here I am standing, fixing myself and broadcasting to everybody! Renewal came with experience with and of God and of course, my psyche gave a BIG point to it. Kudos to every critic I have! I owe it all up to you...